Good Deed #1

Yesterday started my Lenten journey of paying it forward. And what do you suppose I did for my random act of kindness? Well, it wasn’t anything spectacularly big … but I suppose by being a “random” or unplanned act, it doesn’t have to be anything astounding.

I must say, though … for my first “good deed,” I couldn’t ask for anything more simple and direct. Meaning that I really didn’t have to go so far out of my way to look for something nice to do. In this case, as I was walking into my work area … which just happens to be in a high traffic conference room area … I just happened to look down at a rather important-looking piece of paper that rested on the carpet. I bent down to get a closer look and realized that it happened to be someone’s RN license. And the name on the license didn’t belong to anyone that I knew.

As soon as I settled in to my cubicle, I logged on to my computer and proceeded to email the person whose name was on the license. Within minutes I was handing over the RN license to particularly happy individual; grateful that he didn’t have to spend the time logging on to the State’s website to print up a copy of the original license I just handed to him.

Our Engagement Picture
Our Official Engagement Photo. Look how *young* we look!

There you go … my first random act of kindness. And now, I get to unveil the first (of many) things that I’m thankful for.

I guess I will go for the most obvious thing (at least for me) that I’m grateful for … and that would be the fact that I married my best friend. Seeing that we first met in high school and have been together as a couple since the summer I graduated from high school … I am thankful that we have grown up and “grown into” the relationship that we have today. In other words, both of us have been very fortunate that we haven’t had any previous “baggage” to bring into our world; that we’ve been able to build our adult relationship from scratch.

And because I know there aren’t that many couples out there that have had this luxury of growing up together into a relationship and having the patience with each other as we’ve fumbled through “rookie” mistakes, I know that we’re lucky. And I am most grateful.

So there you have it … Day 1 of 40 done.

Blessings & Curses

I know it’s a little late, but Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone.

Since Hubby & I knew we’d be spending the day traveling back to Chicago, we had our “date night” last night. So what did we do? Well, nothing special … other than a very simple dinner and a trip to the movie theater to see the latest romantic comedy, “Valentine’s Day.”

The movie was cute and definitely enjoyable. I loved all the different vigniettes and how they were all interconnected (or tied) to one another. However, there was something about this movie that wasn’t quite up to par with my all-time favorite romantic comedy, “Love, Actually.” Maybe it’s the Brit humor, but I just seem to like how that story unfolds better.

Let’s see … what else? Oh yes; Emily is finally “Back in Black.” Meaning, of course that my “Pepe Le Pew” white stripes from my grey hair is finally back to being completely black. Yeah, I know … I really should be dyeing my hair after 2-3 months. But the cheapskate in me doesn’t want to shell out the money to do it.

I know, I know … I could always do it myself; buy the dye from the local drug store and spend a Saturday night “washing my hair.” Except there is no way that I’d be able to dye it myself without getting hair dye all over the counter and floor. At least with the amount of hair that I have, anyway.

I consider myself “blessed” to have a head full of extra-thick coarse hair. And despite the fact that I use “extra-strength” hair dye with all that ammonia and other fumes, my hair is pretty darn healthy. Not that I mean to boast about my hair, but I’ve been told by many-a-person that they would kill to have my head of hair.

Except, with this blessing also comes “the curse.” And my curse just happens to be gray hair. I blame genetics and heredity for my prematurely graying. Both my parents started graying in their late 20’s/early 30’s … and me? Well, I started graying in my mid-20’s; progressively getting worse each year to where I truly could look like the Bride of Frankenstein if I go too long between hair appointments. But at least I have a head-full of hair that definitely keeps my head warm in the winter time!

Anyway, the whole “blessing and curse” thing about my hair had me thinking of my other blessing/curse; especially since today is the day all about love.

First the blessing: I consider the fact that I married my best friend my # 1 blessing in life. And the fact that I found him early in my life is just a huge bonus. Because really … who better to grow up and grow old with, and share all life’s adventures with than your best friend?

And now the curse: No surprise that the curse is our inability to have children of our own. It’s just frustratingly disappointing that Hubby & I won’t be able to experience one of the biggest grand adventures in life. But I suppose that as long as Hubby’s by my side, every day will be a grand adventure.

It’s strange to actually write those last two sentences on my blog. For years, it’s always been about how unfair it was that Hubby & I couldn’t have children. After all we have such a great relationship and would make such great parents. However, the older I get (and the further distance I put between myself and my childlessness), the more I begin to appreciate the so-called “Grand Adventure” that infertility has provided Hubby & me.

It’s because of IF that I’ve begun to realize that life is full of such “blessings” and “curses.” For every negative aspect of life, there must be an equally positive aspect.

And it’s also because of IF that I’ve discovered that life is about finding balance in everything. That whatever aspect or experience in life that might bring us down … there is yet another aspect or experience in life that will lift us up. The key just happens to be in finding this balance.

So I think that’s what I’m going to try to do with every unsettling situation I run into, regardless of whether it’s my personal or professional life (or even my checkbook!). I’m going to try to find the counterbalance in any aggrevating circumstance. Perhaps this will get me more into that Zen state that I’ve been trying to achieve for years …

Oh, and because it happens to coincide with this year’s Valentine’s Day, Happy Chinese New Year to you. May the Year of the Tiger bring you much happiness and prosperity!

I'm Bringing ___ Back

Oh yes, I’m at it again; listening to the smut that is morning talk radio.

Yesterday’s topic revolved, once again, around compliments. Except instead of “back-handed” ones, this time around it was what a woman would love to hear her significant other say to her.

It started with the comment that apparently Sarah Silverman had made about her new boyfriend. She said ,”I think he’s the first guy in a decade who’s given me any kind of compliment, like saying I’m pretty or anything.”

Which, of course, had the men on the morning show saying, “Yeah, like pretty okay , that is.” And I admit, I chuckled a bit. But then I thought, “Well, yeah, she could be pretty …”  Which was exactly what the women on the radio voiced as well. Then men on the show countered that the women’s response was the male version of “pretty okay.”

Of course, the men were right in that statement. So from there, the discussion went on to what women would absolutely love to here from their significant other. Specifically, what ONE word would you love to hear at the end of this phrase: “You are so ___.”

Hubby tryin' to catch me all sexy 'n sh*t ...

So of course Hubby turned to me and said, “What would you want to hear me say?”

I sat next to him in the passenger seat quietly contemplating that same thought. And finally after being pestered for a few minutes, I finally answered with: “I need one word to cover both smart and sexy.”

And Hubby turned to me, grinning ear-to-ear, and said,”Smexy?”

Uh, no. Somehow, I had this peculiar impression of … I don’t know. Smelly and … well, you get the point.

Consequently, I spent all day yesterday and this morning trying to come up with the one word that could tie both smart and sexy together. And the only word that I could think of is Captivating.

And now, oh Bloggie Friends … what ONE word would you love to hear?

Tears Like Diamonds

One of my favorite characters is back for the season finale of Heroes tonight. As I sit here watching the show, I can’t help but think of how much Hiro reminds me of my Hubby.

On the drive to work during a warm September morning last year, Hubby & I heard that song “Her Diamonds”  on the radio. I had heard the song off of Rob Thomas’ latest album many times last summer and was looking forward to seeing him in concert later in October.

However there was something about hearing that song on that morning with the sun rising off Lake Michigan that had me truly listening to the lyrics.

“Her Diamonds” talks about a woman  who has reached her limits; who has gotten to the point where she doesn’t know what else to do but cry. And because the song is written from a man’s perspective, we get to hear how he deals with the emotions this woman is going through.

It’s amazing how certain songs can elicit the most visceral reactions. “Hero” by Enrique Iglesias is definitely one of those songs that will always be tied to the incredibly enduring love I have for my Hubby. And now, after finally understanding the lyrics behind his song, Rob Thomas’ “Her Diamonds” will, too.

That morning with Hubby sitting in the driver’s seat, I couldn’t help but squeeze the hand that held mine just a little tighter. Because those lyrics that Rob Thomas sings … well, they’re everything I’ve ever imagined my husband’s thoughts and emotions were during the most difficult parts of our Infertility journey.

And Honey? Just so you know, having you in my life holding my hand and heart … that’s all I can ever ask of you when my “diamonds” start falling down.