Light the World, Little Ones

It’s been a crazy-hectic few weeks since last posting. This new career, though challenging and rewarding, has been pushing me to exhaustion.

As with any major change in life, my level of stress and anxiety has increased accordingly. But what the Type-A Registered Nurse in me needs to remember is that it’s only natural to feel this way. I just need to remember to breathe and  channel my inner-Zen.

I’ve had some blog posts in draft-form for quite a while now; including my experiences as a Catholic Infertile dealing with the options of family building. Except I don’t feel that it’s polished enough to be published at the moment.

However, today I wanted to come out of my seclusion to remember my nephew, Liam. He was a fighter for the four months of his life. And even though it’s been more than three years now … there isn’t a day that goes by that he doesn’t somehow enter into my thoughts.

October 15th is recognized as National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Today is a day to remember those who have suffered a miscarriage, an ectopic pregnancy, a still birth, or the loss of an infant.

And today I remember the loss our family felt three years ago.

But today, I also remember all those friends I’ve met over the many years of blogging about my infertility journey. I remember their loss and heartaches as well.

In fact, I remember all of those who have suffered miscarriages and stillbirths on their quest to build their families.

And even though it’s not quite the same … I remember those who have gone through the heartache of a negative pregnancy test, despite knowing that a beautiful embryo (or more than one) was implanted into a warm inviting womb, with the hopes that their “embies” will continue to grow into reality.

I remember the two beautiful “would-be babies” that I welcomed into my womb, but — for some reason — weren’t meant to stick around.

I remember the one beautiful “would-be baby” that Hubby & I reluctantly let go.

So today, I ask that you take a moment to say a little prayer or send some positive karma (or whatever you’d like to provide) for those who have suffered any loss in family building.

And at 7 pm tonite — if you have a spare moment — light a candle to remember those little ones that may not have grown up to be big babies … but grew into our hearts and our souls.

Light the world, Little Ones … Light the world.

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Related Posts:

The one where Emily remembers

The one where Emily lets go

The Official National Pregnancy and
Infancy Loss Remembrance website