Warning: Long post ahead
Short version: Went to local Resolve event and met two of our fellow IF bloggers. Ended up with two new IRL friends and a renewed spirit towards adoption.
Wow. I can’t believe how SMALL Blogland can actually be! Earlier tonite, I attended our local Resolve chapter’s annual “Ask the Expert” night for the first time (more on that later). And who should I happen to come upon?! Not one … but TWO of our fellow IF bloggers!!
Now, I have to preface this by saying that I had a slight notion that I might see kcmarie122 tonite as I knew we lived in the same general area of the world. When I got the eblast from Resolve (and also a comment on my blog from MamaSoon), I thought that perhaps she might find this event interesting and posted a link on her blog. That’s how I found myself continually glancing around the room to see if anyone looked remotely like her profile picture. I thought I caught a glimpse of her once while sitting in one of the session, but as soon as that session was over I suddenly lost sight of her. SO … imagine my surprise when she came up to me during the dessert reception afterwards! Ah … kcmarie122 … you are just as sweet and kind as I imagined you would be. I am so happy we finally got to meet!
Let me tell you a little more about why my Hubby & I decided to go to this event before I tell you who else I stalked met.
When I received the eblast, I was a little hesitant to sign up to go. I wasn’t sure if I was just about ready to take another step forward in my adoption past. I can’t remember if I blogged about this, but the last time I inquired about adoption at this one agency, they were already calling me back after only one day and then called again a week later. Now for some people, that aggressive first part on the agency might be a good thing. But the fact of the matter is, it’s taking me this long to make that first call (at least, this time around) … I don’t want to feel rushed or pressured into making a decision that I might not be that comfortable with. I’m sure there are agencies out there that are not like that, but this agency put a bad taste in my mouth at that particular moment. Who knows? Maybe when I’m finally ready to dive into adoption, I might want that type of “aggressiveness” on my side. But not just now.
But I digress (yet once again) … The thing is, we decided to go because we figured that this might be a way to get resources about adoption and not feel pressured into making a decision right then and there. Plus, the whole adoption forum of this night was basically a panel of different experts (lawyer, doctor, professor, counselor, and adoptive parent) discussing their experiences with the different parts of the adoption process. And then after they each spoke, they were asked questions written by us, the audience. Talk about major learning experience for me. It was refreshing to hear about the other aspects of the adoption process by actual “professionals” without having it be fed to us by an adoption agency, who really … sometimes I think are mostly after the money that prospective couples are willing to shell out. (Okay … yes, I know that’s an irrational thought skewed by said-adoption agency above.) Hubby and I got a lot of good info and having gone to this forum has renewed my spirit and added a little more spring to my steps towards adoption.
Quickly though … I should add that this Resolve event had a separate forum (or lecture, really) on ART, well. Truth be told, there were many many many more people in that forum than there was at the adoption one. But that’s okay. This is the stage in my IF journey that I’m in. I now know (in my vast wisdom – so said, sarcastically) that my limit for IVF was one … After all, I spent more that enough time and money doing unnecessary clomid cycles followed by more than enough medicated cycles before I was smart enough to figure out that the particular RE I was going to at that time was not suiting my needs. Yeah, that’s how smart I was.
Again … I digress. (Sorry, my ADHD — never actually diagnosed, by the way — is on full tilt today.)
At the end of both forums, there was the aforementioned dessert reception where I met kcmarie122 ( 🙂 still so giddy!) This gave us an opportunity to talk to the panel of professionals as well as meet and greet other professionals. Which was a good thing, because we were actually able to talk to the lawyer who specializes in interstate adoptions for a bit, and ask her about certain concerns we had about adopting domestically. In addition, this also gave us an opportunity to enter into some prizes they were given away including gift baskets, a free consultation with an adoption lawyer, a free acupuncture session, an others. But the two big prizes for the night were a $10,000 prize towards an IVF cycle or half off the price of an adoption homestudy (approx $700 in value).
Hubby & I listened patiently as the organizers drew tickets for the smaller prizes. One of the names and the person’s subsequent city called as a winner sounded just ever-so-vaguely familiar. And as this person walked up to claim her prize, she certainly looked just as familiar to me, too. I turned to Hubby and whispered, “I think I know that person.” He looked at me quizzically as I told him that she might be someone that I might have seen somewhere out in the IF blogiverse. At the evening’s end, the “Grand Prize” winners and alternates (just in case the winner decides to forgo adoption or the winner of the other prize, for some reason, is unable to complete the IVF cycle) were named. Hubby then urged me to go across the room and introduce myself to this mystery lady. “No, that’s okay,” I told Hubby, but he persisted even after I told him that I would feel as if I was stalking her.
So finally after being pestered enough, I approached said-woman and said, “Excuse me … you might think this is an outrageous question but …. do you blog?” And as this nice woman looked at me strangely (not to mention, a little leery … I mean after all, we’re talking about metro-Detroit here. You know … “Murder Capital of the World.” Yeah … NOT!), she turned to me and said, “Yeah, I do. I’m SoapChick.” And then I think I exclaimed, “I thought you looked a little familiar!,” a little too excitedly and I might have startled her a bit. And then I introduced myself and the rest was history. We ended up talking for quite a while and it was just SO wonderful … like meeting someone you think you know, but not really.
And then the REAL weird part was that when I told her that I just met kcmarie122 earlier, Soapchick kept telling me that “the name” sounded familiar. She said that she sat next to someone during the raffle drawings that may just have been kcmarie122. And as we traded descriptions of this person, we both came to the conclusion that it was kcmarie122 that she was sitting next to. Then, just as Soapchick, Hubby & I parted paths, who should we run into again but kcmarie122 who confirmed that she was sitting and talking with SoapChick at the same table! How absolutely weird and awesome is THAT?!
After attending this Resolve event tonite, I’m reminded of how far along I’ve come since even just starting to blog. Last year at this time, I was still struggling with even dealing with my feelings about my infertility. I had stuffed all my emotions inside of me that I was just waiting to explode. It didn’t help that I was facing yet another Mother’s Day childless. And it certainly didn’t help that there were currently plans underway for a baby shower for my SIL who was then pregnant with Liam. It would only be another week later that Liam would be prematurely born; which then brought yet another wave of emotions that needed to be stuffed. Yeah, I was at a pretty bad place last year.
And this year? Wow. I’m not only able to blog about these emotions, but I can actually talk about it. To total strangers. And be not only okay with it … but completely thrilled about it. Okay, so we’re not totally strangers, having shared our stories online with each other unknowingly. But still. WOW!
So kcmarie122 and SoapChick … I am so incredibly thrilled to have met you IRL. It’s absolutely mind-blowing, knowing that I’m not only NOT ALONE in this big blogiverse … I’m not even alone in my own county and state! My next goal … meet the others in this fine state of Michigan …
Oh! And I forgot to mention the other fortunate thing that happened to me tonite. My name ended be pulled as the second alternate winner for the Adoption Homestudy prize! Woo-hoo!