Protected: Sole Trading
Protected: Finding the Peace Train
Milestones
Yay! Made it through the first week of posting daily … and now I need to get through 3 more weeks. I can do this … I can do this …
Well, especially since I really should be spending this “lazy” Sunday afternoon actually doing those every day tasks I should be doing at work. Like getting some weekly case reviews together, and calculating … oh, who cares ?!
Point is, work’s network decided that I spent enough time at my work desk yesterday that I’m not able to log in remotely today. At least one of us is looking out for my sanity …
So instead I get to spend the afternoon writing today’s post earlier than 7 pm at night.
And today’s post is one that I should have written on Wednesday, but honestly knew I wouldn’t have the time I really wanted to spend on writing it. So today’s the day.
Last Wednesday would have been my Grandma Rose’s 100th birthday. And while I know Grandma is in a better place, I can’t help but be just a little sad that she wasn’t here to celebrate this milestone birthday with us.
About a year and half ago, all of the Aunts and Uncles started plans to organize a “family reunion” in the Philippines, just in time for my Grandma’s 100th birthday. By this time, I had already been in contact with quite a few of my cousins on Facebook. We had all talked about surprising her by making the trip out to the Philippines just to be there for this special birthday. But by Christmas time 2008, Grandma was beginning her decline and plans had been put on hold. And then Good Friday rolled around, and then Grandma was no longer her with us on Earth.
I think about what this loss means to me and to my relationship with my Mom’s side of the family. She was the string that TIED all of us Aunts and Uncles and cousins together; the common bond that we all shared. It would have been incredible to go to this “family reunion” and spend time with all my cousins and Aunts and Uncles. As it is now, most of my Mom’s side of the family live on the East coast or are still back in the Philippines, so we rarely see them anyway. I just happened to get lucky by keeping in touch with a few of them on Facebook. But sometimes … especially when you actually know the person IRL … well, sometimes it’s just much better to be able to spend “real” time with them.
Anyway, even though it will be a year this coming April, not a day goes by where I don’t think of my Grandma Rose.
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On completely separate note … I must say that today I’ve reached a milestone of my own.
Just shy of three years, I’ve officially written my 300th post. Go me!!
Tie-ired
Eesh. I’m frickin’ exhausted. I woke up this morning with the intent of going into work ahead of the rest of my staff, so I could pick up a big Box O’Joe and sweets from Dunkin’ Donuts for all of us. Yeah, something about almost falling asleep during dinner last night should have clued me in.
So when the alarm clock went off this morning, I could barely drag myself out of bed. But alas, I managed to do my usual morning routine for a working weekday … for the sixth day in a row.
Nope. Not bitter at all that I had to go in to work today. Not at all.
Except … Well, I really don’t mind working at alternate hours. Truth be told, I do better and manage things better without a constant routine. I like working “alternative” hours instead of the typical 9-to-5, Monday thru Friday -type of day. I’d rather be doing my work on my own schedule; which could be on a Saturday. At 7 o’clock. In the evening. I’m just more productive that way.
Which, when I reflect on my whole “baby-making” years and the minute-by-minute schedule we had to follow, is rather twisted. Especially since I was never ever able to “produce” anything (or rather any ONE) during those active IF treatment years.
And now that I’m finally in a place to understand a little bit more of the real Emily, it all begins to make sense. Why I was *so* miserable during that time; why I felt I had little control over my body, let alone my life.
And it’s all because I absolutely HATE being TIED to a schedule. To a DESK.
Hmm. Maybe I need to find another line of work … professional beach comber perhaps?