Friends – Page 10 – Apron Strings for Emily

27 November 2008

Fleas On My Dog

No … there are no fleas on my puppy-girl, Kozzy. Actually, this is the way that my co-worker sings the Christmas carol, “Feliz Navidad.”

“Ah … now I get it,” I can hear y’all chuckling. But what does this Christmas carol have to do about Thanksgiving … other than the fact that today (or tomorrow, how ever you want to look at it) is the “official start” of the Holiday season?

Well, funny you should ask. Last year at this time Hubby & I, along with my parents, were on a Caribbean Cruise. One of the days was spent in Cozumel, Mexico where, as we stepped off the “boat” all I could hear throughout the plaza was that Christmas carol. And just the thought of hearing a Mexican Christmas Carol while in Mexico … it just had me in hysterics.

Anyway.

It’s about 8:00 am on Thanksgiving morning. Hubby’s getting some much needed sleep in the bedroom while I’m on the couch typing away on my lappie. I’m still getting these horrible coughing fits, but for the most part I’m feeling much better. Although, I have this feeling I’ll be losing my voice by the end of the day today. Damn sore throat.

Plans for today include lunch with my parents after the traditional Filipino Thanksgiving Mass. My parents asked us if we were going to attend; in which I promptly said that this morning was the only opportunity for us to unwind before another busy weekend. Which, in a sense, is the plain truth. But I also just honestly don’t feel like having to deal with the inevitable social conversations that involve Filipino acquaintances commenting on our child-less status. Seriously, there’s only so much of this an infertile can take … even if it’s been more than ten years! But seriously, it should be a nice sit-down lunch with my parents at the local Italian restaurant.

What?! Did you just say restaurant?!

Mmhmm. Yes. Emily, with or without the apron strings, is not exactly that great of a cook. And quite frankly, while I can do a turkey dinner, it just doesn’t seem to make much sense to do so when it’s only going to be the four of us. Oh, I suppose I could invite Hubby’s family and the other members of my side of the family … but then that would mean 20+ people in our home which, at most is only comfortable to fit five around the table. So yes … turkey lunch at a restaurant with my parents.

But don’t you worry, we’ll still have the traditional turkey fixin’s. At Hubby’s parents house. Later tonite. Where YAY! I get to see my nephew and niece. And BOO! Might not get to hold niece because of being a bad sicko.

So overall, busy day. But one that will be spent with family. After all … isn’t that what holidays are about?

Oh, and technically this is also supposed to be the day to express gratitude … so, without further ado …

Things to be extra-thankful of this year:

An incredible husband who takes care of me when I’m sick (and we’re talking both physically and emotionally), and who has been my rock for the past 12 years.
Loving and supportive parents who understand the reason for upcoming changes
IRL friends and co-workers (not to mention bosses) that have also been supportive and excited for my upcoming change in employment
Extra-wonderful pets … who have no idea what changes are store for all of us, but who are always willing to snuggle with me and give me some furbaby love
An incredible online group of friends who have weathered with me during some of THE MOST difficult times in my life over the past year
And last but certainly not least,
God for giving me back a little bit of faith in this world. That somehow when one door closes … another door opens. Even though it might not be the door that you were hoping would open.

Happy Thanksgiving, Blogland!!

25 November 2008

Two Cokes …

… after 10:00 pm is never a good idea. And I know that, yet I still drank them. Grrr.

Last night, Hubby & I had the pleasure of dining at one of our favorite bars/restaurants with one of our good friends. And because it had already been a long day, I needed a little caffeine boost. Not to mention that it helped that tickle in the back of my throat.

When getting home, I knew that I would crash easily. What I didn’t expect was to wake up at 4:45-ish and toss and turn.

Of course, it really could be that I have a lot on my mind right now. Especially with the new job starting in (OMG!!!) about 6 weeks.

Or it could just be that I’m still not feeling as great as I could be. But at least now I’m being properly behind-the-counter medicated (read: prescription antibiotic and expectorant).

Instant Human Oh yeah … so the good news from El Doc is that it’s not pneumonia. (Whew!) But if I don’t get that gunk out of my upper chest and sinuses … it could quickly turn into it. (Crap!)

So yeah. It’s official. I do indeed have snot for brains (and apparently for lungs as well) … !

Now if you excuse me, I must find my next caffeine buzz.

And so the vicious caffeine cycle begins …

18 November 2008

Accepted

(Update 03.19.2009: Now that the cat’s out of the bag, I can finally un-PWP this post!)

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~

Well … it’s official. I accepted the supervisor position. And at close to the salary I wanted with an added sign-on bonus, too. BONUS!!!

So all that’s left is to complete the drug screen and the background check. And apply for this state’s RN license. And find a place to live. At least those are the most immediate things I need to do. Before my start date which is unofficially January 5th.

I finally told my parents last night. And amazingly, they took it pretty well. I think deep down they knew that there just seemed to be something missing in our life. And as wonderful as our marriage was, we just didn’t seem to be happy. So I think that when I told them how this whole opportunity just seemed to be calling out to us, I think that sold them on the idea.

I probably won’t tell my current employer until I get the official notice; which should happen after the drug screen and background check are completed. But in the mean time … since you guys have been so incredibly awesome and patient with me, the least I can do is tell you where we’ll officially be moving.

Unfortunately, Kara … it’s not California, although it would have been awesome to move out that way. I can tell you that perhaps one day we will move out further west; as that would be both Hubby & my dream to live close to the Pacific. And no, Pam … it’s not Minnesota either. Or Indiana, Io. But where I’ll be will definitely be a closer drive for all of us to visit each other.

Yes, Hubby & I will still be in the Midwest … Chicago, to be exact. It’s a city that Hubby & I have always talked about moving to, even back in our college days. Except the opportunity just never seemed to surface. And then any chance of moving stalled once we took the journey down the infertility road. Because starting our family became our priority.

Now, it appears that this city is calling to us again. And lately, all the signs have been pointing us to that direction. And I am So. Frickin. Excited!!

11 November 200813 June 2011

Bit O' Tears

Cutie Girl: “Mom, can we go over that girls’ house?”
FB Friend: “What girl?”
Cutie Girl: “You know, that girl, my friend with the dog and the cats . . . she said I can come over anytime.”
FB Friend: “Well, I’m sure we’ll have to see if it’s okay with her mom”

– Posted on my Face.book Wall

Two Saturdays ago, we celebrated my niece’s baptism with a party afterwards at my in-laws house. At that party was one of my Hubby’s family friends and her 5 year old daughter. This little girl is so precocious; so bright that you can’t help but be infected by her laughter, enthralled in conversation with her.

This past weekend, her mom posted the above conversation on my Facebook wall. And I can’t tell you how big my heart swelled when I read it. Wow, I thought. I must have made some sort of impression on Cutie Girl. That she would remember such a conversation that even I couldn’t remember. (But then again, when don’t little kids remember more details than adults?)

And as I mentioned in previous posts, I’ve been spending a lot of time with my cousins. First, with my older cousin’s wedding. And more recently, with my youngest cousin’s cotillion. As family usually does when gathering together in such occassions, we began to reminisce on our youth; on growing up in our family. Two of my cousins, sisters about 6 and 8 years younger than I am, brought up how much they used to love staying at our house. They remembered all the times we’d play in our basement; me pulling them down the stairs in sleeping bags and all around the basement while pretending that they were on a roller coaster. They remember how I used to get them to do silly dance routines with me when I was 13 or 14 to great 80’s songs like Wha.m’s “Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go)” and Rob Bas.e’s “It Takes Two.” And they remembered how, when I was in high school, I would teach them to sing Depec.he Mo.de songs in perfect harmony. The one comment that stuck with me was when one of them said to me, “You were my favorite cousin when I was a kid. You were always so much fun.”

On the drive home from our trip this past weekend, I couldn’t help but put these two separate events together. And think, once again, how much I love kids … how much I’ve always loved kids. And, while I don’t mean to sound arrogant or proud, how good I am with them. How natural it was for me to be with them.

And at that moment, I also couldn’t help but think … how f*cking ironic that I can’t have any of my own; at least “naturally.”

As I told Hubby these thoughts, I also told him that the pain … it doesn’t hurt as much any more. This feeling of failure; of emptiness. This indescribable sadness. It’s not as deep.

But every once in awhile … at moments like that, I can’t help but spill a bit of tears.

07 November 200813 June 2011