Six Cents

It’s been another long time since I’ve done a PWP post. This one has more to do about the recent events that have occured at work over the past week.

If anything, I know that employers and/or future employers can very well decide to google me one day and I’d hate to have them stumble upon a post about my particular line of work.

So if you’d like to follow along (and perhaps offer some sage advice), please comment on the post below and I’ll email you the password.

For those of you that have read my other PWP posts, the password is the same one I’ve used in the past. But seeing that it’s been well over 6 months, I totally understand if you might have forgotten it. Comment below and I’ll hook you up.

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In the mean time, since the PWP post is a pretty detailed post, I might as well do my daily Lenten practice. And if you’re wondering how I’m actually writing in another language … it’s not that I’m multi-lingual. I’m just having fun with Google Translation! (Today, is Tagalog … and don’t ask me if it’s conversational, because I might be Filipino, but I’m an illiterate Filipino!)

Check out one of Hubby's *awesome* pieces of work!

Mabuting gawa ng araw: I think I may have found my new profession. I may not have the face of a Super Model (although Hubby begs to differ … he’s so sweet!), but apparently my hands are good for modeling Hubby’s designs for his portfolio. I posed my hands pro bono today … but if all goes well, I might have to wear hyperbaric chambers on my hands (a-la David Duchovny style in Zoolander) to prevent them from aging!

Pasasalamat ng Araw: Today I am grateful for living in a diverse city. Particularly because it’s much easier to find various ethnic foods around here than it was in Metro-Detroit. My aunt and cousins introduced Hubby & I to this tiny Chinese bakery that’s pretty close to our apartment. And mmmm … is it ever good, especially when it’s freshly made. Today we picked up some of my favorite baked BBQ pork buns, freshly made sesame seed balls, and moon cakes. Yummy!

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Okay, so that’s it for now … again feel free to comment below if you’d like the password to the following post …

Saving Daylight

I usually hate this weekend; the weekend where we turn our clocks forward one hour. I find that losing that one hour totally screws with my circadium rhythm. And the older I get, the more it takes my body to readjust.

Earlier this week, I told a coworker of mine about my hatred of these “Spring Forward” weekends. This coworker, always the optimist, had told me he was the opposite; that he always looked forward to Daylight Savings Time in spring.

“What’s not to love?,” he asked me. “We might lose an hour, but we gain an hour of sunlight.” And all I could think was how right he was.

So I think I’m going to take a page out of my coworker’s book and look forward to longer and warmer days.

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Buena Acción del Día: Today was a day of pequeño good deeds. One was patiently waiting for a couple of older women walk up a set of stairs at a restaurant so that we can follow our hostess. Another little good deed was allowing others to use our surge protector to plug their laptops. In any case, any little good thing we could do, Hubby and I tried to do.

La Gratitud del Día: I love date night. Tonight Hubby & I ended up at a movie theater to watch Shutter Island. There’s something about movies that make it such a great activity for us old married folk to do on a laid back date night.

Blockbuster Night

Oh, don’t let the title of this post fool you. It’s not as if I have anything spectacular lined up for me tonight.

If you want to know the truth, I’m sitting her on our couch, watching one of five Blu-Ray discs we’ve rented from the local Blockbuster. And, if I can stay awake long enough, I’m looking forward to watching at least two of these discs tonight. If not … well, at least Hubby & I have Saturday and Sunday to watch them.

It’s been a mentally exhausting kind of day for me. Being “off the floor” and in that leadership class yesterday had me catching up on lots of emails and “issues” that occurred while I was gone. And, in particular, one rather large issue that has been ongoing had me dealing with gastric reflux since Tuesday evening. Unfortunately, that’s a story for another day. Because right now, all I want to do is finish this post and snuggle with Hubby while watching some blockbuster movies!

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Before I get to my Lenten duties … I just want to wish my nephew, Tyler, an incredible birthday. I still can’t believe he’s fourteen!!

Early 90's pic of (future) Hubby & I at the old Herschel's Deli and Bakery in Troy, MI. Sigh ... I miss Herschel's

Lenten Gratitude of the Day: I am so thankful for Friday nights. They’re full of possibilities for the weekend. In my young adolescent years, it may have been staying up late and watching Love Boat and Fantasy Island with my parents. In high school, it may have been a variety of evening outings to Denny’s or Herschel’s. In those college years, it may be heading out to City Club to soak up some late night goth/industrial music. Now? Well, obviously it’s spent doing more low key things; like going to the movies or renting them … unless, of course, we’re heading back to Detroit for the weekend. And quite frankly, I’m quite okay with it.

Lenten Nicety of the Day: Let’s see … I spent a lot of time today fixing “things” for my staff; stuff that should have been taken care of from a higher level of management. But again … this is something for another post. But rather than rehash it now … I’ll just let you know that this was my good deed. And you’ll have to trust me on that. <sigh>

Pushing It

Don't forget DJ Spinderella!
Don't forget DJ Spinderella ...

Remember that song by Salt n Pepa? The one that goes, “Ahh … <inhale>, Push it”? The same one that I used to say “Bullsh*t” instead of the real lyrics? I just thought of that song today during a Leadership class I attended today.

I should start off by saying that our department is really decent about providing its supervisors and managers with continuing education classes. In fact, every month we typically have one of these all-day sessions, which is a great time for us to focus on “us” as leaders. And which is why most of us look forward to these days.

Today’s class happened to be about being assertive while not appearing pushy. (A-ha! Now you get my Salt n Pepa reference!) It’s one thing that I know I have issues with; not necessarily about the “being pushy” part, but the “being assertive” bit. You see, I know that I tend to be passive rather than assertive or aggressive. I know that I tend to be indecisive rather than authoritative. I know that I tend to lean towards keeping things harmonious rather than try to stir the pot.

Not that I mean to keep rehashing old issues … but a good example of this is how I dealt with my infertility. Especially up to the point where my SIL announced her pregnancy with my nephew, Liam. Rather than make others be subjected to how much of a failure I felt, I kept all those feelings in. I may have outwardly shown that I was okay, but in truth I was a big unhappy mess inside. Once I found out about the pregnancy, all those insecurities tore open wide … And there was nothing I could do to stop myself from openly feeling miserable.

In the same token, I know that once a particular “button” is pushed; whether it be a verbal or nonverbal action, I can go full-force into agressive mode. Which, again I don’t mean to rehash another old issue, happened to me with my SIL following the birth of my niece, Kairi. And even though I felt “better” about finally expressing everything I had ever felt about my infertility, I felt … guilty for doing it in such a manner.

Yet, for a while there … the time period between Liam and Kairi, there was a little bit of assertiveness. Perhaps I wasn’t directly assertive; because, truth be told, I never physically approached a person face-to-face about my infertility. But that assertiveness came in the form of my blog; where I was able to sort through all the emotions and insecurities I had about myself and my lack of ability to create a life. And where I was able to express these feelings in a written form.

During today’s class, I learned that most people who are not assertive feel that they are not in control of their situation. As a passive person, that lack of control comes forth in the sense of indecision. As an aggressive person, it comes forward as being forceful and emotional.

To become more “assertive” (and therefore less passive or less aggressive), one of the learning tools that we learned was to determine when the optimal time would be to have that conversation about behaviors or actions. In order to determine that optimal time, we must first determine what our worries are about having this conversation.

In order to do that, we were given instructions. First, we needed to write down all of these worries. Next we were told to eliminate any of those worries we had no control over. And finally, we were told to take those worries we had control over and ask ourselves, “How can I … ?”

That last step was key for me. It’s that one that I knew would be able to ease my discomfort in having an assertive conversation. First of all, it forces me to realize those worries I knew I couldn’t change. Secondly, it helped point out those concerns that I knew I could modify. And finally, by asking “How can I … ?”,  it allows  me to feel as if I was part of a solution to a problem or situation rather than appearing aggressive and dictatorial.

More important was that first step … at least to the blogger in me. That step … the one where I need to write all these worries down … helped confirm that what I had been doing has been helpful in allowing me to grow in assertiveness. Because blogging about my frustrations and anger and jealousy; it allows me to vent when I need to vent and cry when I need to cry, without having all those emotions build up … until I take out my aggressions in an unhealthy manner.

I hope that this little tidbit of information helps other bloggers also feel justified in wearing their heart on their sleeves, whenever writing about their emotions. And I also hope that those nonblogger readers of mine find that what I write in my blog … well, sometimes they are things that I can’t say in my real world. You know, the one where I’m still learning not to be so passive …

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It’s official. I’m pass the halfway mark for my 40 day Lenten promise of paying it forward. Today is Day 21! So let’s get it started …

Good Deed of the Day: Since our leadership class finished up early today, we were able to leave work about an hour earlier than usual. One of my co-workers needed to take a commuter train to her suburban Chicago home, but unfortunately she was between trains on the schedule. Rather than have her walk all the way to the train station on her own (as she tends to either take a bus or walk with other coworkers who were still up on the floor working), we both took advantage of a beautiful Chicago afternoon and walked it. This, however, is the same co-worker who has not been in her best health and became short-of-breath rather easily. So rather than have her keep up to my (already) slow pace, I took it even a pace slower … and tried to do most of the talking, so that she didn’t have to walk and talk at the same time. Even though this is something I would have naturally done for any patient I take care of, I find this one even more satisfying because I knew that I was killing two birds with one stone: I got her to exercise a bit so that she’d continue to gain strength. And I got her to the train station in a safe manner.

Gratitude of the Day: Even though I know that these leadership clases tend to take us away from our daily duties at work, I am so grateful that we get this “perk.” Because I tell ya … every time I go to one of these, I come back with great nuggets of information.